putti: a different light
As promised in my previous post, though later than I'd planned (it's no longer Sunday, not by a long chalk in any hemisphere), this was the light on the same grave when I revisited the churchyard of St Mary's in Linslade, Bedfordshire, in May with my friend Phil.
Had I not previously visited the cemetery and churchyard in such lovely light as I had in November, I probably would have zealously photographed the graves in the churchyard and the adjacent cemetery.
But having seen it during the golden hour after a morning of rain, this light was simultaneously too flat and too harsh.
I'm so pleased my first encounters with these places were in the right lighting.
putti: a death (k)nell
I took these photos of a grave in the churchyard of St Mary's in Linslade, Bedfordshire, in November 2025, the second time I sat Jilly in her new home in Leighton Buzzard.
I set out for a photo walk from Jilly's house along the Grand Union Canal to the church and the Old Linslade Cemetery after a morning of rain.
Photographing the neighbouring locations around 15:00 in autumn was perfect timing, capturing the church in the golden hour before the early sunset.
The light as I walked back along the canal to The Globe Inn was lovely, though there were only sheep, no cows, for me to remark upon the lovely light upon them.
It was almost pitch black by the time I finished my post-walk pint and headed back to give Jilly her dinner.
Phil and I followed in my footsteps during a photo walk in early May this year.
The weather was perfect for our walk, especially as we were taking photos on 120 film using two pinhole cameras Phil owns. We took our time wandering along the canal, discussing life, the perils of AI and all manner of other topics.
I also had my D700, though I had neglected to charge my spare battery the night before and the charge remaining in the battery in my camera was very low, so I was sure it would run out of juice before we finished our walk (it didn't!)
When we arrived at the churchyard, I remarked upon how much difference the light made. It had seemed almost magical the first time I had visited, and I had taken over 70 photos in November.
In May, in "glorious" sunlight, I captured only 12 photos.
I've revisited places before and taken as many or more photos as the first time. But the light just wasn't right. It was too harsh and bright, and the magic just wasn't there.
I captured a few photos for my season's grievings series and a handful of other photos of the church and churchyard, but something was lacking, which I admitted to Phil at the time.
When I share the one photo I took of this grave on my second visit next Sunday, you'll see what I mean.
In the meantime, I was going to call this post 'cherubim: a death (k)nell'. However, in checking my usage of the word, I learned that the chubby, angelic children with wings many of us know from Renaissance paintings as 'cherubs' are not what was described in the original biblical references.
So, instead, I've chosen the plural of the Italian word, putto, used for the figures depicted in so many artworks we can think of.
Once again, my photography (and mild obsession with semantics) has increased my knowledge.
time in looe
It was a dark and stormy night when Phil and I drove into Looe. The storm had a name. Its name was Goretti*.
Despite the forecast warning of winds of up to 90 mph, we braved the elements. The weather and the journey were less hairy than I had expected from Warwick Parkway to near Bodmin, but not far from the Jamaica Inn, as the daylight started to fade, the driving rain started to have more of an impact on our progress.
The first, most direct route we attempted to take from the motorway to Looe had become flooded. The second route we considered was most likely too.
Thankfully, my need to use the ladies' led us to The Archer Arms, a village pub in Lewannick, where one of the locals gave us detailed directions for the safest route into Looe.
We made it through No Man's Land and into Looe at about 20:15, not long before entry to the town became inaccessible due to fallen trees and branches.
The most suitable car park was only a 5-10 minute walk away from the Harbour Moon Inn, where we were staying, but with winds of about 67 mph and the rain still coming down (though thankfully, somewhat less heavily), it was quite a challenge to walk to the hotel from the car.
As it was the off-season, the hotel's kitchen wasn't open. However, the staff kindly pointed us to a selection of local restaurants that would still be open, despite the weather, and allowed us to bring our Indian food back from the Viceroy to eat in the warmth of the inn. I'm ashamed to say that it was my first authentic biryani (microwaveable ready-meal versions don't count!)
By the time we sat down to eat, the wind had dropped to about 63 mph, but we were well and truly indoors for the rest of the evening. The experience of being out and about in the storm was both nerve-wracking and invigorating; definitely an adrenaline rush.
Though I don't cut the waif-like figure I once did, I'm still a short 5'2"-and-a-bit in height, and apparently still light enough to be almost lifted off my feet by the gusting winds we encountered walking back across the Looe Bridge from East to West Looe.
I only captured a handful of iPhone photos of the dark and stormy night we arrived.
We woke to a lovely blue sky (as seen in the photos above), which came and went with some lingering showers over the next couple of days. Apart from the wet and windy greeting on arrival, we fared much better with the weather in Looe than in St Ives and when we popped in to have lunch at the Jamaica Inn on our way back from Cornwall.
Phil and I really enjoyed our visit to 'Shipton Abbott' of Beyond Paradise fame. The locals we met were all so friendly and welcoming, and I have plenty more photos to share (of course!)
fresh. frozen.
I hope to share a "proper" update tomorrow, but for now, here's a photo I took of a fresh grave, littered with frost, in January 2025, in Pinner New Cemetery.
It's not that cold in London at the moment, but we're not expecting temperatures above ten degrees at least until Monday (the forecast only shows me until Sunday).
(For Stranger Things fans, the family name on the grave is Hawkins.)
dynnargh
A belated dynnargh - welcome - to 2026.
I should have been here earlier. Alas, the past few weeks have been a tad stressful.
I had my last working day in my day job on 17 December. I had hoped to spend a large chunk of time editing around job-hunting, but there was some life admin and a couple of appointments to fit in before I headed south to Bromley for Christmas with the kittehs and the wee hamster.
Christmas was my usual (mostly) quiet affair, with the added pleasure of an early Christmas dinner with Sabine before she went north, and another on Christmas Eve with two good friends, Sophie and Dan (it would have been Christmas dinner, but the UK don't run public transport on Christmas Day and the pubs were closed, so we brought it forward).
I admit, I had a fairly lazy Christmas, as I was still mentally and emotionally exhausted from the past six months, but I was looking forward to returning home on 27 December to immerse myself in photo editing for my end-of-year wrap-up blog, which I was hopeful of sharing this year after having to forego it last year with my home move.
Unfortunately, my external Duo drive, containing (almost) all my life's work, had other ideas. I came downstairs on the day to pack up my laptop and the drive to travel home, and it was making some fatal clicking noises. Only a few folders from my primary drive (Daisy) appeared, but my Time Machine backups on Violet all seemed visible and accessible. However, after turning it off and back on again, neither my laptop nor my iMac was able to find the drives, except through the WD Discovery app. That showed the drives had a configuration fault.
Fast forward to yesterday, and I've provided a portable drive to a local(ish) company to copy the data they have recovered from Daisy, about 3 TB of what should be about 6. They haven't been able to access Violet to restore anything from her.
Fortuitously, I made a full backup to another drive (Orchid) in early April, when I had to reformat Daisy and Violet from MacOS Journaled to APFS. So, I have everything up to that date.
I haven't lost any raw or mobile photos as they were all imported to Photos on my iMac. I exported those not already on Orchid within a couple of days of returning home.
In addition, I had copied my client files and some day-to-day documents to my iCloud drive and a portable drive (Winnebago) that I usually take with me to Bromley. I copied the majority of files across in October and November, so they are relatively up to date.
It's unclear at this stage what the 3 TB recovered consists of, but I've resigned myself to the strong possibility that everything I have on Orchid and have retained on Winnebago and iCloud is all I will get back. The files seem almost unidentifiable from what the data recovery company has shown me. The task of reviewing them may not be as arduous as I first thought, as I'll likely sort by modified date and find there is little, if anything, created or edited since early April that I can recover.
So, while 2025 was a disappointing year from the perspective of how few photos I edited, it's somewhat positive when I consider the final edits I've likely lost. At a quick estimate, it's still about 50+ final edits, but not the hundreds to thousands I might have edited in previous years.
Dealing with that administrative nightmare (as well as formatting my replacement drive, sorting out some cloud storage, and trying to resolve the additional error Disk Warrior has started identifying with my iMac) will have to wait until next week.
Later today, I'll be heading down to Cornwall again with my friend and fellow photographer, Phil, to capture Looe (Shipton Abbott to fans of Beyond Paradise). And to revisit St Ives (where I took this photo on 1 March 2025) and Penzance.
I'm a little apprehensive, as we expect Storm Goretti to land in the area later today, and we're staying in an inn on the river. Fingers crossed the storm isn't as bad as forecast and/or it doesn't affect Looe too badly.
At least if confined to the inn, I have plenty of job-hunting and other things to be getting on with!
I hope 2026 is treating you kindly so far.
merry christmas!
with bells on
holly wreath
A day late and posted late in the day.
I'll be back on track for tomorrow's instalment!
work christmas party
I finished work for 2025 today.
I'm still technically employed until 31 December, but I also finished my last working day for an organisation I worked for for almost four years this afternoon.
Thankfully, our work Christmas party a couple of weeks ago didn't look like this.
forever in our hearts at christmas
pre-christmas overwhelm
This week was busy (which underplays that the previous weeks were too).
I ran out of time to share a 'season's grievings' photo on Thursday, or on Friday as a catch-up.
So, here is today's contribution. It pretty accurately sums up how I'm feeling at the moment after such a busy week.
Don't get me wrong. Most of the past week was positive:
Kitteh visits with two local kittehs and two slightly less local kittehs that I'll be sitting more often in the new year, staying overnight.
My last "anchor day" in my current job was on Wednesday, as I finish up my contract next Wednesday.
Eating pizza in honour of the departure of another colleague and me (which is a breakthrough for me after over three years, for those who are in the know).
A cheeky pint near work sponsored by our CEO.
Visiting the Night Owls and Abstractions exhibition at Royal Festival Hall on the Southbank, the annual exhibition of art by "individuals in prisons, secure hospitals, young offender institutions and immigration removal centres, as well as people on community sentences and probation" that Sabine and I have been trying to coordinate to visit together for a few years now (maybe as many years as I've been sitting her kittehs for). It did not disappoint and was very inspiring.
Preparing to go to Oxford for the weekend to visit, this is what you get, with a couple of longtime friends. It's an exhibition of artwork by and related to Stanley Donwood, Thom Yorke and Radiohead.
The downside was a heartbreaking update I received yesterday evening about a friend in Australia.
Although being busy with sittings is a good thing, especially in the lead-up to finishing my contract, I'm looking forward to a three-day work week next week. I'm looking forward to no pet-sittings, and time for job-hunting, editing photos and catching up on life admin, before a mix of social and anti-social Christmas festivities kicks in.
(Does it count as "social" or "anti-social" if your interactions are only with cats and a hamster?)
This year, Sabine and I will be able to enjoy an early Christmas dinner together before she goes away, as neither of us will be working (I'm usually working).
I have an(other) early Christmas dinner scheduled with friends in Bromley for Christmas Eve eve.
And there will be cheese, cider and kitteh cuddles galore (as well as binge-watching TV and films) over the break.
I'm also hopeful for some creativity and reading!
I hope the lead-up to Christmas is more zen for all of you! x
how do you like them apples?
a hessian-bound christmas bouquet
a wreath with all the trimmings
a light is from our household gone
lily of the incas
A cluster of Alstroemeria, commonly known as Peruvian lily or lily of the Incas, that I photographed at Helmingham Hall during a visit with my parents in summer 2017.
red roses and reindeer
It's that time again.
As has become something of a custom, life is "all change" again this December (well, at least on the work front).
Despite that, I'm aiming to share new images from my season's grievings series every couple of days between now and Christmas and make them public approximately two days later.
I hope you enjoy!
I photographed this grave in Abney Park Cemetery in February 2012. The inscription is hard to read through the plant life, but it could be for Thelma Marie Lucas. Alas, I haven't been able to find anything to confirm that or to inform me more about the interred.
I hope that those who love you miss you this much and more after you're gone.
(Though, without the requirement of it being so physically visible. I personally don't want to be buried, so there would be nowhere specific like this for those who love and miss me to show it in the same way.)
bianca frangipani
Early in the new year, I received a message in my Instagram DMs from a woman in Massachusetts, Monica, who had seen photographs I'd taken at Pinner New Cemetery. I posted several photos I took in December 2023 as part of my annual season's grievings series in the lead-up to Christmas.
Monica's aunt, Bianca, passed away tragically at the age of 31 in 1962 and is buried in Pinner New Cemetery.
Bianca and Monica's mother had kept in touch over the years, but family circumstances had kept them apart. With Bianca in London and Monica's mother in the US, she (and Monica) had never seen the memorial laid on Bianca's grave in the cemetery.
My friend and former flatmate, Floriana, was the reason I visited Pinner New Cemetery in December 2023, as she works in Edgware on Saturdays and was attending a work Christmas lunch at a restaurant in Pinner. Consequently, we'd organised to meet at The Queen's Head before her lunch.
Monica asked me if I would be willing and able to revisit the cemetery to take photographs of the grave for her.
Coincidentally, I already had plans to meet Floriana again the following weekend. We had planned for Floriana to revisit my neck of the woods (our shared flat was in Wood Green, and I live in the adjacent suburb of Hornsey) to meet.
However, I contacted Floriana and suggested we meet in Edgware or Pinner instead, as that would allow me to revisit the cemetery and be more convenient for her. (As it turned out, there weren't many options for pubs near her work, so she drove me home from the cemetery, and we went to my local instead, as we'd originally planned).
When I agreed to look for Bianca's grave, Monica sent me further information, including the plot number, maps of the cemetery and the location of the grave.
Exploring Pinner New Cemetery
Looking at the map Monica had sent me, I was almost 100% certain I hadn't ventured into the section where her aunt had been laid to rest, but I looked through my existing photographs first to confirm my memory.
When I visited Pinner New Cemetery for the first time, I almost immediately came across a section dedicated to infants and children, which was towards the front of the cemetery. The section was simultaneously beautiful and heartbreaking, and I walked the full length of it to a corner of the cemetery, taking photos as I went.
Among other things, the child and infant section offered plenty of opportunities to capture season's grievings images, as so many of the graves were decorated for past Christmases (it was slightly early for decorations for the current year).
I explored other areas of the cemetery during my approximately 45-minute visit. However, as the days were short at that time of year, I stopped taking photographs at about 15:30 and started heading home, having only covered about half of the cemetery.
It was my second cemetery visit of the day - I visited Paines Lane Cemetery around midday before meeting Floriana - and ultimately, I had an even longer journey home afterwards than I'd expected. I don't recall the exact journey time, but it was substantially more than the already long 1.5-hour Tube journey it should have been due to train issues.
Seeking others' ancestors
A woman from Ontario contacted me in June 2023 via a comment on my photo of a grave in Brockley and Ladywell Cemeteries. She approached me about locating and photographing the graves of two of her ancestors.
Knowing how vast and overgrown those two cemeteries are, that there's no clear demarcation between them and how old the graves she sought were, I hadn't been too hopeful of finding them.
On that occasion, I spent about 45 minutes searching for the graves with no luck, and I couldn't find any groundskeeping staff on site to ask for assistance.
I contacted the Friends of the Cemetery shortly after my visit to see if someone could point me in the right direction. I was cat-sitting for a friend nearby so I could return more easily than usual. However, without a section letter, they couldn't assist. I passed the information on to the woman who had contacted me, but she chose not to pay for access to records that might have provided her with the complete plot number for me to follow up further.
Finding Bianca
I was far more confident that I could locate Bianca's grave with the map and plot location provided.
Monica had mentioned in her messages that she feared the grave would be overgrown. I hadn't expressed my concern that it may be worse than that.
When I visited both Paines Lane Cemetery and Pinner New Cemetery, I recall being shocked at how poorly maintained the graves seemed. Admittedly, I was visiting during the depths of winter, and it had been raining much of the time while I wandered through Paines Lane Cemetery. And while the weather had cleared somewhat before I reached Pinner New Cemetery, the paths were still far from dry. But the drainage in Pinner New Cemetery seemed insufficient, especially in the sections I spent most time in, which were at the bottom of a gentle slope.
I was nervous that I would visit Bianca's grave and find it waterlogged.
Thankfully, on the day I visited, it was a brisk three degrees, and the grass and flowers still held a light frost in the early afternoon, but there were blue skies and no rain to worry about. Bianca's plot is also at one of the higher points of the cemetery, so it's less affected by poor drainage.
The map Monica sent me proved very helpful in locating Bianca's grave, although I initially overshot into the furthest section of the cemetery.
Once I rechecked my location, I questioned what the map was showing me. Beyond the first row or two of graves near the path, a large part of the section seemed to be only lawn at first glance.
But then I realised there were flat headstones inlaid into the lawn that had become partially sunken. That made it hard to be 100% sure which plot was which, and I initially lifted away fallen leaves from a gravestone about two plots over from Bianca's.
I should have photographed each gravestone before I pulled away the leaves, in case I had found the correct grave. But I didn't think of that as I was more intent on discovering Bianca's final resting place than making aesthetic choices and capturing photographic 'reveals'.
When I found the right plot, I was pleased but simultaneously disappointed for Monica and her mother that the grass and soil had encroached so far across the inscription.
After removing all the leaves, I found that, short of asking a groundskeeper (none were in sight) or gently taking a trowel (that I didn't have) to the surrounding lawn, I would only be able to photograph about half to two-thirds of the gravestone for them.
But at least I could see enough of Bianca's name, month of death and age at passing that I could be sure I had found her.
I took photos of the gravestone and of it in the context of the surrounding graves to share with Monica. I placed some of the leaves I had removed from the marker back onto the grass by the grave.
Although I'm not particularly spiritual, I talked to Bianca while photographing her gravestone. Letting her know her niece had sent me to find her and that her family was thinking of her.
I took most of the photos of the grave with my D700, but I captured a couple with my iPhone and sent one to Monica before I left the cemetery to let her know I had found Bianca.
Monica hadn't told her mother about my mission until she sent her the photograph I had sent. It was lovely to hear about her emotional response to the photo.
It gave me a warm glow to have been able to go just a little out of my way to capture something so important to others, to be their eyes across the pond.
where the lilies bloom
I have a feeling of déjà vu, wondering where June went, just as I did in mid-May, wondering where April had gone.
I mean, I know where it went. I lived it. But life took me away from sharing work here.
Since my last "life" update, I've completed the two-week sitting with Chilli in Moulsecoomb, Brighton, that I mentioned in that post.
I have never been happier to travel during a heatwave because I learned from the Met Office app before heading away that Brighton was a good few degrees cooler than London for the following week. Not as good as Scott and Shirley's experience in Cornwall, where it was a case of "Heatwave? What heatwave?!" I think I only had to turn their fan on while I worked two to three times during the whole stay.
I arrived on Friday evening in the middle of a heatwave to find it was one of the select few nights within the past three years that the Bella Ciao pizza van wasn't in the vicinity. They were doing a roaring trade at a music festival, instead. I replaced my usual homemade pizzas (not every night!) with their tasty fare.
Chilli was such a lovely kitteh to hang out with, spending most of each morning into the early to mid-afternoon lazing on the dining table within arms' reach for comforting, sensory pets whenever I needed it (which was often; it was a stressful couple of weeks).
In the afternoon, he would wander off into the yard. Sometimes hanging out with other neighbourhood cats. Who I photographed, of course, where I could.
In the evening and breaks during my work day, he would settle on my lap or legs as I lounged on the sofa. Never settling for long, but purring with approval while I pet him.
I hibernated during the day after my arrival, as it was still about 30 degrees. But the following day, I set off with my camera across Bevendean Down Nature Reserve towards the village of Falmer.
Scott introduced me to the Outdoor Active app before I set out and shared a recent walk he'd taken across the downs, so I had some sense of where I was going. I tracked my walk so you can see it if you're interested.
I took a lot of photos with my D700 and some with my iPhone during the walk. It was a pleasant way to clear my head, passing by a mixture of overgrown paths, open fields, cows, sheep, woodland-type environments, a quaint village, a busy motorway and ending in a rabbit-warren of a pub (and somehow completely missing the model train above the bar - I blame my height).
The following weekend, I coaxed two friends down from London to visit Lewes. My primary knowledge of the town was from Scott's photos of their Bonfire Night parades, which I still haven't managed to experience firsthand.
We visited Lewes Castle and Museum, wandered the streets, traipsed across town to the former village of Cliffe and the Snowdrop Inn (named after a deadly 1836 avalanche, which was, unfortunately, shut for a private function), and wound up in the Beak Brewery, under the looming chalk cliff face of Cliffe Hill.
The following day, I climbed another hill (Brighton is not short on hills - Encyclopedia Britannica explains why hills are "downs" in that part of England, which I admit somewhat confusticated me until I read why) to visit some of Brighton's cemeteries. As Scott observed, almost all of Brighton's cemeteries are in his vicinity, the exceptions being Hove and Portslade Cemeteries.
Despite setting out late in the day, I visited the Brighton Jewish Cemetery, Woodvale Crematorium, Woodvale Cemetery and Extra Mural Cemetery before popping into The Gladstone pub and The Bear Inn to quench my thirst and get a reprieve from the sun on my way back to Scott's.
With Brighton's unofficial recognition as the LGBTQIA+ capital of Britain, I was disappointed that The Bear Inn wasn't full of bears. Maybe I was there at the wrong time of day.
Ironically, having spent two weeks there, I didn't manage to visit Brighton proper at all during my stay.
I had entertained the thought of attending a screening of the 1920s film version of Nosferatu with a live score at the Duke of York cinema. But life worked against me on that one.
I also thought I might have a chance to do some long-overdue clothes and shoe shopping, and perhaps even seek out some collage materials. But, alas, no luck.
In my week at home between sittings, I managed to catch up with the lovely Sarah Jansen for a sedate but verbose (on both sides!) evening in a couple of Camden pubs while she was briefly in town. It was lovely to see her on my side of the world for the first time since 2011, although we have managed to meet up twice in Australia in the interim.
As I write this, I recall that I have some charming portraits I took of her on her last visit to London that I haven't yet edited, for some inscrutable reason (well, mostly due to a lack of time).
Earlier in the month, I had my first sitting with my regulars since early May. It was lovely to have cuddles with Lily again while I rewatched season one of The Deuce before catching up on the second and third seasons (the third season is still in progress). The season one soundtrack is brilliant.
In addition to hanging out with Lily, Sammy, Poppy, Oscar (all cats) and Charlie (a hamster), I popped in to feed their neighbours, George and Lottie, for a few days. I fed Sabine's new fish in her pond, navigated Ollie's varying moods when he came to visit, and was hissed at by Ollie's sister, Lola (she was a showgirl... 🎶) when I dared say hello to her at the patio door.
I arrived home to a letter from the hospital that confirmed the probable diagnosis a registrar gave me in November for a health issue I've been dealing with for about three years. It's something of a relief to have a definitive answer, finally, but the psychological impact of living with the symptoms for such a long time will take more time to resolve.
And, in but a few days, I get to spend a couple of weeks with my favourite doggo, Frank! I can't wait to share in his excessive emotional response to my arrival (it's very much mutual), savour his cuddles, chuckle at him playing dead when I return to the bedroom after my shower, and share his contagious happiness with others.
The summer silly season of sittings is about to start. I'll have two nights at home between sitting Frank and my regulars and another two nights between my regulars and my excitable puppers in Bishop's Stortford, before the post-holiday lull.
I'm looking forward to the mental health benefits all the cuddles with my feline and canine pals bring. I'm not as keenly anticipating the potential heat the rest of summer will bring. But at least the homes I'll be staying in are better designed to handle said heat than my cosy loft studio.
And I have a five-night stay in Finland to plan, as a treat for myself at the end of my crazy summer of sittings.
In the meantime, I hope to get back into the swing of regular posting. Thank you for staying with me x
